“As soon as I saw the trapeze I knew I had to do it! I climbed to the top of the ladder and I was so scared I wanted to climb back down the stairs yet was told I had to step onto the platform. Then I was afraid to take the step from the platform at the same time I grabbed the handle because I knew there was no going back! After several minutes I finally took the step and Continue reading
First of all I am letting go of whatever needs I’ve had up to now to be verbose when I write! LOL I now look forward to writing shorter posts (ok this post could still be shorter) and getting to the point. I also let go of any need I may have for anyone to read what I write or comment. It sure makes it a lot more fun to let go of expectations. I am writing for me. It lightens my load and opens a bigger space inside of me to create. And if there is a lot more to write I let go of the need to make it short. I let go of the control. I let go of any need to control. I let go of any part of me that makes this feel like work. I let go of anything inside of me that does not allow me to have fun with my writing.
So much good comes from letting go.
Five years ago I let go of my business. It was not bringing me pleasure anymore. It was early February 2008 and after several years of thinking and wondering I had an instantaneous knowing. I was standing in my kitchen and I realized it was time to close it. I was going to put a note on the website and say “Gone Fishing” and see what was next.
In that instant I felt a great comfort – like a giant HUG from the universe and I knew that all would be ok. It was a great feeling to be ok with not knowing what was next. I knew I would be taken care of and that my bills would get paid. And the inspiration came to sell it and it was easy. It sold in 90 days because I was willing to let go of it.
Earlier this year I let go of my house. I had been nudged to sell it ever since I sold my business. I let go of clutter, sold a lot and donated and threw away much more and I still have a 10 x 20 storage unit. Yesterday I was there in search of a few things. There is much more to let go of. It feels so good and it takes courage.
And now I would like to let go of having to know where my next “permanent” home will be. I really want to know now! I am living on the other side of the city from what I am used to for the past 30 years. I have had to let of my need to get my daily cup of coffee from Whole Foods because it is just too far to drive everyday. Oh I miss visiting my store! Somehow it will all work out. And the sooner I let go of the how to get it the sooner I will have it!
That’s what I’m talking about.
Everything I’ve experienced in the past decade could fall under the heading of “reinvention” and if there was a defining moment that set me on that path it would be the following…
In the spring of 2004 my Houston consultant gave her resignation because she was moving too far away to commute. I called my client to request a meeting so I could share the news (they loved our consultant) but they were not interested in meeting with me. I soon learned that they were doing everything they could to undo the relationship we can created. So I shared the news via email.
The next day my client called our office to speak to our consultant and my intuition told me to sit in the office when she took the call. And he did what I suspected. He tried to hire her and it just shattered me. Even though I had mentioned my hunch to my HR consultant two weeks prior it was still incredibly unbelievable. I had been working so hard for so long, invested my time, energy and savings to create the best systems possible and this was how they showed their appreciation! The next day he was the one calling me to request a meeting and I told him I would think about it.
Two weeks later it was my consultant’s last day and I took her to lunch and then we were going to attend a meeting with the client to discuss her open cases. At lunch she shared that my client was going to “replace me” with an employee. They were going to “make me” tell her everything about the contract …ie..How we did things and how to use the database that my company funded (I was going to use this for other clients). They thought that I was going to give in and let them do anything they wanted! NO!
( I had learned a big lesson. It took me a long time to say no to them because I was so afraid of losing their business. The consulting fees were bringing in $25,000 per month. Then there were product sales from the contract and internet sales but the consulting fees were a major portion of our business. I had intended to get the contract running efficiently for the first few months and then meet with other clients for new business but this client made so many demands on my energy. As much as I tried to breakfree I was unable to focus on new business because I did not stand up for myself and the needs of my business and employees.
I saw the client as my source of money instead of only one possibility. I was totally disconnected from my Source at that point…I was just beginning to study the law of attraction even though I had known about it since the 80’s. It would take me many years to clear the energy that lived inside of me since my early youth that had created this mess in my adult life.)
So we went to the meeting. When I arrived at our onsite office they had already removed our company name off the door and replaced it. And the employee they were going to give the contract to was there in the office and was going to come into the meeting. I walked up to her, looked her squarely in the eyes and told her she was not invited. I was taking my power back.
We began the meeting with just three of us….myself, my employee and my contact’s associate. A few minutes later my client walked into the meeting, leaned into my face and began pointing his finger and yelling at me. He was so filled with rage that it was almost humorous … especially when he could not roll his chair through the door because it kept bumping into the door frame!
At one point I thought he might actually hurt me. My employee and his associate were in shock. I could have grabbed my brief case and walked out but my body was frozen.
He was demanding that I do what he wanted and I told him “no.” He kept testing me and I kept saying no. It took every ounce of courage I had.
After we walked out of the meeting I discovered that many in the vicinity heard what transpired. We were right next to the medical department and the elevators. My contact had lost control. He was under so much pressure to produce that he was completely out of touch. He was removed from the contract and his boss (the one that awarded the contract to me and hired him to micromanage) called to take me to lunch.
They realized they had made a big mistake by trying to replace me in my own contract and now they were just trying to smooth things over. They wanted me to begin a new level of work at another location under the same contract even though they had already broken the contract by cutting it in half. My lawyer and my therapist at the time both gave me the same advice “Do not even think about it.”
I wanted to take the work. It would have been at least $100,000. I “thought” I needed the money at the time to make up for the work they took away but in the end I did not take it.
After that fateful meeting I could feel the “connectors” in my brain breaking apart. I was officially in a mid-life crisis… a spiritual crisis and it affected me physically. I took the next two months to rest and recover. Thank goodness for my consultant in the New Orleans office who was working and bringing in income. Plus we had the internet sales. Once I felt better I consulted for another couple of months until the contract was officially over and several months later I recovered 20% of the income we had been denied.
It took quite a while to see the beauty. I knew that there was something new for me to do in the world but I had no idea what that was. I was beginning a new path and it was the beginning of an intense journey of healing and self discovery. I believe that everything happens for a reason and when we are able to let go new possibilities and doors present themselves to us.
In fact this week three doors closed for me so I am paying attention to what new doors are opening for me!
What if challenge is just a made up scenario when things don’t go as “planned?” If we allow ourselves to go with the flow and stay out of resistance what is the challenge?? 🙂 xoxoxo Wendy
I share an update about my recent move – the 3rd one this year – well technically I am not living in a particular place right now but I did manifest something really cool in the process. I speak about trust and being “home in the heart” – ok I did not say “heart” but I did touch my heart. Let me know how this inspires you! xoxox Wendy PS. I do believe this is an example of living very courageously!
I was setting up to create videos and an officer gave me an idea!
The past 60 days have brought much clarity to me. Eating a mainly raw and vegan diet for 30 days and cutting out cheese really helped to release the necessary brain-fog so that I could obtain this new direction in my life.
The biggest news I have to report is that I am selling my house! Letting go and surrendering is moving me forward. I have no idea where I will be moving at the present time. I am going with the flow and staying focused in the present moment in the best way I can. I am clearing out my house of a lifetime of “stuff” that has just been sitting around in closets, cabinets and on shelves. Plus I am letting go of inventory from my ergonomic business that I sold in 2008.
It feels so good to release all of these items that have no more space in my life. Releasing the clutter is good Feng Shui and it is clearing my mind. The process of clearing has guided me to things I misplaced. Unexpected pockets of money have opened up in various areas directly related to moving things out.
Some years back I bought a food dehydrator and then misplaced it. I searched for it for years and finally bought a new one this past spring. Well I found the old one and was able to return it to Bed, Bath and Beyond and will now be applying that credit towards my Ninja blender since my 30 year old Osterizer blender broke recently! Ya’ gotta love the timing on that!!
So many fun stories like this.
A big physical move such as this really gets things moving! Nothing can stay the same. I welcome and embrace this adventure that is not for the faint of heart. Some people look at me and cannot believe I do not have a place to move yet. Things are falling into place in perfect divine timing. I know this in my heart!
Looking forward to two separate launches in the coming week and I am in the process of creating the artwork for both!
PS. My house is the launch pad for my new life and I am excited!
This past Saturday I chose to participate in free MUSEum day here in Houston. It was 8:20 in the morning and I was watching the local news talk about all the planned activities for the day and I was inspired because it sounded like something different and fun! Who couldn’t use some of that?!
So I was out of the door much earlier than normal so I could get a good parking spot for the day and hop on the 17 MUSEum bus tour! It was fun and felt like I was in a different city.
The first MUSEum I went to was giving out complimentary posters and I think I grabbed about eight. I was considering whether I was going to take one and it was suggested that I do since the artist passed away last year and the poster would be worth money. It was a poster of some boxes as you can see! The artist was Robert Rauschenberg.
What was really great is that I learned where all the MUSEums in Houston are, met some people, saw someone I knew and made some business contacts.
There was creativity all around me and lots of energy! It was a breath of fresh air and allowed me to relax and enjoy myself in expansive ways.
The best part about the day is that it inspired me! I was receiving all sorts of creative ideas about artwork, speaking and other programs for my business.
Part of the inspiration came from just letting go and playing and allowing inspiration to flow in. When I was looking at the artwork it gave me ideas for my artwork and I have already created three unique pieces of artwork that encompass my iLoveU design.
And then the BEST part of the day (for me!) was as I was leaving the bus to walk towards my car when I saw a woman wearing a t-shirt with the word museum on it. Except what I saw was the “MUSE” in museum and I thought “Yes, of course!”
MUSEums serve as muses for creative people and creative wannabees!
So if you want to be inspired go to a MUSEum. Walk around and take in the creativity and the beauty and the inspiration all around you.
It does not matter what you want to be inspired with. The MUSEum is a place to be inspired in every area of life and in every career.
If you are looking for a solution for a problem or challenge then sometimes the best thing you can do is let go, play, relax and let the inspiration come to you in perfect timing.
And since there is a “MUSE” in MUSEum that is is good place to start!
I’d love to hear from you!
Love and Inspiration!
In 1991 I pioneered ergonomics and in 1996 I launched one of the first ergonomic product websites which I sold in 2008. I sold it because after 17 years in that business it was time to be authentic in a new area.
(Oh in case you are wondering, the ergonmics website I created is www.ergopro.com. Tell them I said hello!)
I realize that a part of me always thought that to be fully authentic I had to do everything on my own. Of course that is not the case. Authenticity develops on the inside and only recently did I begin understand that on a more meaningful level.
Here’s how it happened.
Nine months ago I met someone on Twitter whom I had noticed before but chose not to follow her because something felt “off.”
Call it intuition.
Weeks later she followed me and her first communication to me was that I was wrong about something. Being my forgiving and sometimes naive self I followed her and let it go knowing we all have our own perceptions.
On one of our early phone calls an intriguing idea presented itself to us. She wanted to get started right away and I was still in the middle of producing my Spiritual Grid Manifestation DVD and told her I was definitely interested and would let her know when I was ready.
Deep down my intuition was speaking to me and I knew that I could not work with her while creating my DVD. Months later I wrote her and suggested we create that program. It just felt like the right time.
We began a series of phone calls and became much clearer about the series. Being the consummate businesswoman I am I suggested a written agreement and even though she ignored me I allowed myself to get deeper into the project and kept “giving in.”
After a short time I realized she saw me as her “admin” when she frequently ordered me to take actions at a moments notice! Again I suggested we create an agreement about responsibilities and again it was ignored. Yet I kept going because the project was still intriguing to me.
I kept doing everything she asked and then got creative and practiced some videos in the park to promote the series. That same weekend she began accusing me of not working and my response was to stop working!
Funny how the mind works. She proceeded to send me a series of accusatory emails and then I began experiencing excrutiating pain and landed in the emergency room and then I could not work! Her emails kept coming even though she knew I was not well for several days. She even told me she did not care I was sick!
That is when I got it! It was the final straw and I told her I did not want to play with her anymore. It just hurt too much.
That very same day I had a series of phone calls with other people and the theme that kept appearing was authenticity!
My first clues of a potential conflict came many months before.
Once I was able to recognize the truth I wrote a letter to the list we created and told everyone that in order to be authentic I had to exit.
Fortunately I also now understand the meaning of authenticity on a deeper level. My authenticity has nothing to do with doing everything on my own as I once thought.
My authenticity has everything to do with staying true to my core beliefs and principles and only allowing people in my life that are serving me. It also has to feel good! When I listen to and take action on my intuition I am being authentic. The experience itself served me well and once I was able to rise above it and receive the learning I was complete.
Authenticity is certainly the theme of the moment for me. What about you?
What areas of your life are causing you to ponder? What have you been putting up with?
Let me know how this has served you.
Well it is time to take action on my new inspirations! But first I think it is time for some dark chocolate. Now that’s being authentic!